I’ve lost track of the amount of times some of my pals have told me about guys trying to date them since they’ve had kids. And as a woman, and knowing a considerable amount about men, I have some advice for you. From me, and my friends! Yes, they asked me to do this because they know the platform my tantric massage website gives me. I have an influence!
You’re not top of the list!
The first thing you need to get straight is the fact that you will never be top of the list. She has a child (or children), and she’s given birth to them. They are dependent on her for everything, and they remain incredibly close, even when they grow up. You will never outshine this. If you ever feel put out that you’re not getting enough attention, you should probably give up; it’s not going to get any better. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about you, or want to be with you. If you want 100% attention, book a tantric massage and satiate your need!
Don’t be another child for her to look after!
It happens time and time again. Just because she’s a mother, it doesn’t mean she’s going to mother you. My friends would like to make if perfectly clear that they realise you may not do this intentionally, but some of you just slip into a dependent role so easily. A woman with children needs to know that she can be vulnerable in front of you, that you are going to man up and be able to take care of her when she’s given the best part of her energies and strength to her children.
Take an interest in her children
She’s not looking for a father for her children, but she doesn’t need a man in her life who is going to do everything he can to avoid contact with her children. She doesn’t want to live two separate lives, she wants them to fit, in whatever way they can, as long as they’re comfortable. And this means you must engage with the children in a healthy way. However (and this is important), it has to be genuine, otherwise don’t waste her time.
If you want her, make it known
This can be said of all women really, including myself and some of my tantric massage friends. If you want the woman, you need to make her know it. Women appreciate stuff like that, it means that she’s not wasting her time. Also, when it comes to children, there’s a very good chance that she has a considerable amount of emotional baggage, that you’re going to eventually have to come to terms with. You need to make her know you love her if you do, she’s probably busting for it!
I hope that’s helped some of you, and I know it’s the message we wanted to put across. Who said that a tantric massage blog had to always be about massage? I do try to get involved! LOL!