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Or of course we could be commiserating one another! What are the chances of them pulling it off against Tunisia? Although I’m not natively from the UK, I’ve been here a long time, as many of you will know. And I have the utmost respect for our efforts in the World Cup. I was cheering us on last time, and I’ll be cheering us on this time. I won’t be placing any bets this year though, I’ll stick to my London tantric massage business, it cost me a pretty packet last year when I got a little too enthusiastic! Must be all the hot guys in shorts running around. Well, when you think about it, there’s a lot more to those guys than meets the eye. Not only are they all sexy as hell, that’s 22 millionaires running around on that pitch you know!

Will you see any money out of this?

Have you placed any bets at all? I wish you a lot of luck. Perhaps if you have a big win, you’ll come and see me? I can’t think of a better way to celebrate an England victory than laying on my bed naked with me running my hands all over you. If you can think of something better than that, be my guest and do it! In fact, tell me what it is and I’ll probably join you!

Don’t call me too late

Whatever happens in the match, be careful what time you call me! Me and my London tantric massage friends do operate quite late at night, but not into the early hours of the morning! And I don’t want you banging around in the middle of the night drunk as a skunk either, by the way. There may be some masseuses that don’t mind this, but I’m a professional (as are all my friends) and we don’t appreciate it. Besides, you simply won’t get the best out of your London tantric massage if you get yourself too tipsy!

Fingers Crossed for England!